Imzadi

INNOCENT LONGINGS
By Carol Sandford
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Counselor Deanna Troi strolled along the corridor to the turbolift with a smile upon her face. At the moment in time, life was good. She had settled well on board the greatest ship ever to hit the skies, and better still, she was close to her Imzadi.

Initially, she had been disappointed that things didn't quite go the way she had planned; that they hadn't become the lovers that they'd once been, but when she finally came face to face with William T Riker once more, he had changed, and she had changed along with him.

Gone was the youthful passion that had taken them to the dizzying heights of youthful passion, and instead came something better; The tranquillity and closeness that had rivalled any long standing happy marriage that she knew of. They had a closeness that meant they were always there for each other, no matter what and an understanding that they both knew that when they needed physical love, they were both mature enough not to let it get in the way of each others happiness, whatever the outcome of any other relationships. At the end of it all, they knew they always had each other and that had come to mean more to them.

Deanna felt the first stirrings that something was amiss as she went to step into the turbolift. Her foot paused on the threshold as her senses told her that she was being followed. She looked along either side of the corridor but saw nothing. She shook her head in puzzlement and stepped into the lift, quickly dismissing the notion and headed up to the bridge.

"Phew, that was close."

The ensign shook nervously behind the column he had dived behind until he heard the turbolift doors close followed by the gentle hum that indicated that it had left the floor. He stepped out from his hiding place and cautiously headed towards Deanna's quarters. On reaching it, his voice squeaked out the override code to admit him and he stepped into her domain.

Quickly stepping inside before he was caught, he simply stood and looked around, taking in all that he saw. He wanted to learn everything he could about Deanna Troi so that when he talked to her, he had some common ground to engage a conversation with the women that he intended to pursue.

He tentively approached her bedroom and drank in everything he saw. Her sense of colour; the flowers that threw a riot of colour and scent around the room. Moving further in, his eyes rested on the photo beside her bed. He picked it up and studied it. It was of herself and William Riker taken some time ago. They looked happy, both smiling as his arms were wrapped around her shoulders as he stood directly behind her, her own hands resting gently on his forearms. He didn't have a beard then and he looked kinda geeky. The ensign smirked at the nasty thought that ran through his mind, and he muttered darkly, "One day, Deanna, I'm gonna be doing that to you."

He set the photo back on the side and purposely headed back to the lounge, reaching into his pocket as he did so. He pulled out a small box that held a small cherub brooch. He had looked up old Earth love customs and symbolic artefacts and he had liked what the cherub symbolised. He had one replicated, taking care to eliminate all traces of use so that he couldn't be rumbled. He placed it upon her small coffee table and slipped the small note under one corner of it. It simply said,, 'From an admirer' Grinning to himself, he hurriedly left her quarters to resume his own shift.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Deanna sighed as she stepped through her own doors and started to strip off her uniform. The thought of the long hot shower had been her uppermost thought for the last hour and by the time she had reached her bathroom, she was naked.

She usually had a sonic shower, but today she wanted to feel to sensation of the steaming water on her body. She stood, unmoving for ten whole minutes and let the water wash the days troubles down the drain where they all belonged. She felt better for that thought alone as she stepped out and wrapped the huge fluffy purple towel around her slender body.

As Deanna wandered into her lounge area, she spoke out loud, 'Computer, music, soft jazz, 20th century.' She continued rubbing at her hair with one corner of the towel and began humming along to the soothing music as it filled the room.

It was then that she spied the gift. She bent to pick the ornate cherub up along with the note. She didn't even bother to wonder who had given it to her. Only one giver flicked through her mind and she grinned at the thought. Will.

Soon after ass she prepared to dress for the weekly poker game in Will's quarters, she felt her spirits soar. *Perhaps he's had a change of heart*, she mused, silently. *Perhaps he want's us to try again, at long last*. She pinned the cherub onto the shoulder of her midnight blue dress and caressing it's shape lightly, loving it's feel, and more so, loving the thought behind it, Deanna left her quarters a lot happier than when she'd entered it an hour earlier.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Beverly met her as they both approached Will's door together, her eyes immediately going to the delicate little brooch. "Oh, Dee, that's pretty, is it new?" Beverly asked.

Deanna nodded happily. "Yes, it is. Will gave it to me. Wasn't that sweet of him?"

The door opened and they looked around the faces, quickly noting that as usual, they were late. Worf almost snarled his disapproval and Data merely looked on curiously. Will, grinning at the obvious joke, stood slightly and mock-bowed to the two ladies. "So good of you two join us...eventually."

Deanna and Beverly looked at each and rose tolerant eyebrows as the same thought run through their minds. 'Big deal!' giggling like schoolgirls as they made their way to their respective seats. Deanna as usual sat beside Will and as he watched Data pass around the cards, Deanna lightly touched his arm. He turned to look at her and she silently sent to him, her face alight with love, *Thank you, I love it*

Her smile was enough to melt chocolate.

His returning smile was etched with puzzlement. Unable to take her comment further as Worf's voice boomed around the table, they broke the eye contact and picked up their cards. Will turned to glance at Deanna several times over the course of the game, but she had obviously decided to save her reason for thanking him until later. But he did catch the sparkle of the brooch pinned close to her breast and wondered who had given it to her.

Atmosphere at the poker table was on a high and everyone was in good spirits by the time the game wound up about 11.30pm. Data was the first to stand and spoke directly to Beverly. 'Doctor, may I escort you to your quarters?'

She smiled and nodded her acknowledgement and made her way to the door. Data stiffly stuck out his arm for her to take and she threw a grin at the others who were watching Data's effort at being courteous with their usual degree of po-faced humour. Her farewell was thrown over her shoulder as she exited. "G'night, everyone, see you in the morning."

There was an awkward moment after until Worf realised that Deanna was hanging back, obviously wanting to stay behind. Worf hurriedly growled his farewells and all but stormed out of the door. Both Will and Deanna watched him go with some surprise and Will teased, "Looks like Worf's a little jealous, Deanna. Did you know you had a secret admirer on board?"

She laughed outright at his suggestion. "Worf!? I don't think so, Will, I don't think my nails and teeth are sharp enough for his kind of foreplay."

Will roared at her outrageous comment. "Dee, as I recall, you left more than a few marks on me back in that jungle on Betazed."

She blushed at the memory, but then she surprised him as she turned in her seat and gently stroked his face. Time stood still as they silently devoured each others features, drinking in each other eyes, remembering the love that they had discovered at Janaran Falls so long ago.

Will's arms came around her body and completely enclosed her within them, and as she kissed the hollow of his neck, he kissed the top of her head. He then lightly kissed her temple and then her eyes, forcing them to close. Then he touched the tip of her nose, and as his hands came up to hold her jawline captive, he finally settled his mouth upon hers.

When Will didn't get any resistance, he persuaded her to open her mouth and delved inside, the action bring a deep, longing groan from them both. At the same time, they remembered how good it had been, both realising that they had been kidding themselves into believing that they could only ever be best friends.

Deanna felt herself gently being picked up and being carried over towards his bed. He laid her down and stretched himself along side her body and pulled her flush up against him. His large hand caressed her small behind and he continued to kiss her until eventually, she broke away gasping for air. Her ragged breaths gave away her true desire and Will's own desire pressed into her stomach. "Deanna," he moaned against her hair. "we shouldn't be doing this, but God help me, I need you." Suddenly, through the haze of desire, he seemed to register what was happening between them and belatedly he found himself asking her, "What made you change your mind, Imzadi?"

She pushed herself up on to her elbow and looked at him with confusion. "What do you mean? I thought you had changed your mind."

He watched her hand come up and stroke the brooch that he had noticed earlier and she asked, "Didn't you give me this brooch, and the note?"

He frowned as he answered her with regret."'No, I'm sorry, I didn't." He asked curiously. "What did the note say?"

She sat up, suddenly realizing with embarrassment that she had put them in a very awkward position. "Nothing really, just that it was from an admirer. I assumed it was you, as it tends to be the sort of thing I'd expect you to do."

He smiled at her, stroking her cheek with one long finger and said gently, "Believe me, if I wanted a lady to notice me, I would sure as hell make sure that any gift I gave, they'd know it was from me."

"So..." she asked perturbed, "Who is it from then, and more importantly, what are they doing in my quarters?"

~~~~~~~~~~

Next morning Deanna woke with a heavy heart. She knew it was for the best that she and Will had chosen to stay, 'just good friends', but why did she feel so bad? From the moment she had left his quarters last night, she felt lost.

Deanna threw herself on her sofa and stared out unseeing at the passing stars. She remembered the time when she was on her home planet waiting for Will to come back to her. She used to stare up at the stars then, knowing that he was out there, somewhere, and that one day she would see him again, of that she was always certain. And now she had found him, Deanna was prepared to wait for him to come to her. Even it took them past their lifetime, she would wait.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Will sat in Ten Forward with a rapidly cooling cup of coffee sitting beside him on the table. Leaning his head on his hand, he stared out at the passing stars.

He couldn't believe that he'd blown his one chance to kick-start the romance between himself and Deanna. He'd forgotten just how good it had been between them and he felt his loins stir just thinking about her. He squirmed in his seat. His stomach knotted as his thoughts carried him back to a time when she'd once laid beneath him, revealing her heart, her body and her soul to him. He could still remember her sighs and the way she begged for more, and for as long as he lived, and beyond, he would never forget the moment he became Imzadi.

Chapter 2

Deanna couldn't wait to reach her quarters after her shift. She felt miserable and it had been a bad day. Will didn't know what to say to her, so he said nothing at all, and that hurt her. Even Beverly's teasing didn't manage to raise a smile, and Worf, well, Worf practically snarled at her if she came within ten foot of him and for the life of her, she didn't know why.

She spotted the envelope as she threw her appointment padd on the table. Looking around her in alarm as she made sure no-one was behind her, she trusted her senses to tell her that she was alone and it eased her fears. She gingerly picked the envelope up and pulled out the piece of paper inside. It was a poem. Very basic, very immature, but very sweet.

'One day you will be mine, to have, to kiss, to hold,

like your picture that speaks of many secrets untold,

One day we will be together. One day, you will love only me

Until then, my love, my dreams will fulfil my fantasy.'

Deanna didn't know whether to be flattered or scared. She knew now that it wasn't Will, and surely it couldn't be Worf. could it? Having nothing to lose, she decided to go and ask him. She'd humiliated herself in front of the only person that mattered, so confronting Worf should be a breeze.

She made her way to his quarters and punched his chime. When he opened the door and saw that it was her, he snarled, baring his teeth and growling deep in his throat, "What do you want!?"

Deanna took a step back knowing there and then Worf was not the sender, so she turned and scurried away, throwing over her shoulder by way of an apology, "Sorry, nothing, wrong door."

~~~~~~~~~~~~

She hesitated outside Will's door and was startled when it opened and he stood looking at her, his eyes not quite trusting what he saw. "Deanna?" he asked.

"Hello, Will," she started. "I... I just wanted to ask, did you send me a poem?"

She held her breath, hoping that he was going to smile and say that it was him, but her heart hit the floor when he shook his head and muttered with annoyance, "No, Deanna, it wasn't me. Like I said before, I like to make sure my ladies know..."

She held up her hands to stop him going any further. She didn't need reminding that he didn't want her. "I know, I know. Sorry I asked"

Deanna quickly turned and walked away before will could say another word. Back inside her quarters, she found herself pacing back and forth, the same frustrating question going over and over in her mind. 'Who could it be?'

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Deanna sat uncomfortably in her chair on the bridge the next day, her back ramrod straight, her hands clasped nervously together on her lap. She couldn't look at Will, but she could feel him watching her. Eventually when her jarred nerves had just about enough, she asked the captain if she could be excused. Using a raging headache as an excuse, Deanna made her way to sickbay.

Beverly was just finishing up some notes in her office when she walked in. Beverly looked up in surprise to see her friend walk in, clearly in mental pain. She rose to meet her, took her arm and ushered her to a bio-bed and as she ran the tricorder over her, and asked worriedly, "What's up, Deanna? You look like hell."

She decided to spill the whole story about the brooch, along with the following episode with Will, and then she told her about Worf and the poem. "It's beginning to worry me for some reason, Beverly. I know it's very flattering, but I'm becoming very uneasy. Someone is coming into my room, and now when I think about it, I'm sure I've been followed a few times."

Beverly looked worriedly at her dearest friend. "Have you told the Captain about this?" she asked with genuine concern.

Deanna shook her head, and answered, "No, because I thought it was Will, or maybe Worf."

Beverly's eyebrows shot up, "Worf! I hadn't noticed he'd got a crush on you."

Deanna 's look made Beverly change her mind. "Have you tried talking to Will?"

Deanna nodded sadly, solemnly remembering the previous nights confrontation, and the night before. "I really blew that one. I thought he wanted us to be a couple again. How could I have been so wrong? He can barely speak to me now." she complained.

Beverly smiled knowingly, "I think you should try and talk to him again. If anyone can help, it's Will, you know that."

As Beverly administered a hypospray for her headache, Deanna knew she was right. Jumping off the biobed, she followed her back into her office. "So, enough about me. How are things with you and Wesley. Has he settled in yet?"

Beverly smiled tenderly at the mere mention of her precious son. "Oh, yes. I think he's in love," she said, conspiriously, "He's always got this goofy look on his face these days, and I am absolutely not allowed to go into his bedroom. Mind you," she wondered aloud, "I haven't seen him with any particular girl, so I don't know if he's actually going out with one or not. But I'm not worried, it's just nice to see that he's normal."

They both laughed and Deanna felt a lot better for their chat and left Beverly to her work. But as she headed back towards her quarters, she felt the creepy sensations wash over her again. But every time she turned around, there was no one there. She reached the turbolift and pretended to go in, then quickly and quietly backed up around the corner and waited with bated breath. She waited until she heard the soft footsteps and then stepped out, only to face Wesley Crusher.

She didn't know who was more surprised, him or her,

"Counselor!"

"Wesley!"

There was an uncomfortable silence as they stared at one another, but then, as Deanna realized that Wesley was the culprit, she exclaimed,. "It was you all along!"

Chapter 3

Once they were in her office, the safest place possible to be, in Deanna's mind, Wesley perched nervously on the edge of his seat. Deanna sat back in her own chair with her arms and legs crossed, and asked, "Why, Wesley?"

He looked pathetically young to her and his voice, when he answered, still squeaked with immaturity. "I'm sorry, but I wanted to let you know how I felt, and I thought that once I'd sent enough stuff, you would look at me a bit different, y'know, more like a man."

Deanna had a great deal of difficulty keeping a straight face so instead she stood and walked around to the front of her desk while she composed herself and sat on it's edge. Deanna knew that she didn't want to lead him or on or upset him unduly so she weighed up her words very carefully before she spoke, "Wesley, I am very flattered that you find me... desirable, but I'm sure you realise that a relationship between us is just not possible."

Wesley stood up in front of her and she found herself watching his eyes as he rose above her. She didn't see his hands rise and take her fingers within his and was so stunned at his forthrightness that Deanna didn't immediately pull away, instead she found herself staring down at their laced hands, speechless.

Eventually when Deanna looked back to his face, she belatedly realized she had made a fundamental mistake; Wesley Crusher was no longer a boy, but indeed a very handsome young man, a man that she could find very desirable, one day, if she was ten years younger.

Taking advantage of her silence, Wesley plunged in head first, careless of of the resulting events that would probably happen once he'd said what he'd always wanted to say to her.. "Deanna, I am in love with you."

She was so gobsmacked that all she could do was stare open-mouthed at him, and when Wesley moved nearer and kissed her lightly and longingly upon the lips, she didn't move one inch. Breaking away for the feather-light and tender kiss, he moved back and simply looked down at her startled face, smiling tenderly at her. He then simply turned and walked out of her office.

Still tingling from the impact of what had happened as it shot through her body, Deanna's fingers lightly touched her lips with wonder and was moved with an emotion that scared the wits out of her. But what really worried her more was her own response to him. Wesley Crusher had managed to bring out the raw, primal feelings that had been bubbling just beneath the surface, and with it came a heat so hot that it now needed to be soothed, and she seriously considered Wesley to be the one to do it.

But seconds later, she snapped back to reality and groaned into her hands as she covered her face in shame.

What had she done?

She was still sitting in the same position when Will called in on her a little later. He looked worriedly at her face, which still wore the remnants of its dazed look. "Dee, are you alright?" he asked. "Beverly said that you were a bit scared about what had been happening, and I'm sorry for the way I behaved. You threw me off balance for a while there and I've only just managed to stand up straight again."

He attempted to grin at her, but she still only stared at him in shock. He swore and grabbed her by the shoulders, shaking her a little to rouse her from the daze. "Deanna, you're scaring me. Has something happened? Talk to me, dammit!"

His mild curse filtered through the fog and she stood suddenly, making a ruse of brushing invisible fluff from her clothes in the hope that it would give her enough time to gather her face to neutrality when she looked back at him.

Eventually she plastered a big grin on her face and attempted to brave it out as she finally turned her face up to his. "I'm fine, Will, and I accept your apology, but everything's okay now. I've solved the mystery. It was just somebody playing a joke on me and I just took it too much to heart, that's all."

Will didn't believe her. He knew her mind was in a turmoil, purely because he could still sense some of it. Her eyes held a sparkle that looked suspiciously like she was close to tears, but even so, he knew better than to pressure her. She obviously wasn't going to talk to him about it, so he let her have the benefit of the doubt, for now. "You're sure?"

Deanna nodded rapidly, forcing the grin wider, and pulling herself out of his hands, she headed towards the door. "Yes, thanks. I've got to go, duty calls. See you later, maybe."

She edged her way past him and hurried out the door and headed towards the sanctuary of her own private quarters. But on the way, her mind raced over and over with what she'd done. My god, I let him kiss me! What was I thinking of? What am I going to do? What am I going to tell Beverly?

Deanna agonized for hours until she finally decided to do nothing. She was sure that Wesley's crush would pass eventually, even quicker still when he realized that she wasn't going to return his affections.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Deanna was more than surprised when she found a single red rose on her table the next morning. She sighed when it became apparent that yesterday's little chat had done nothing to deter him. She pondered whether to continue to ignore him or go and read him the riot act. Or better still, tell his mother. She chose to read him the riot act. "Computer, locate the whereabouts of Ensign Wesley Crusher."

"Ensign Crusher is in cargo bay 3" The monotone voice replied.

Now more determined than ever, Deanna made her way down the the cargo bay areas. She soon spotted him checking over an instrumental panel with another young ensign, and headed his way.

Wesley watched her walk in, marvelling each and every step that she took, even though she was obviously angry at him. She came to a halt in front of them both and spoke to his companion. "Ensign, could you please excuse us for a few minutes? I need to discuss something personal with Ensign Crusher, in private."

The young lad shrugged indifferently and moved off. "Sure thing, Counselor, it's about break time anyway. I'll meet you in the canteen, Wes."

Wesley nodded his agreement and they both watched him walk out of the cargo bay. When the door had closed, Deanna turned to Wesley and attempted to sound cross. "Wesley I..." she started but didn't get very far.

Deliberately, Wesley broke in before she had a chance to finish, moving closer to her, his voice low and sultry. "Hello, Deanna, you look beautiful this morning."

Her mouth opened to say something, but then shut again. Once more he had managed to catch her off guard and she turned away from him to hide the confusion that she was sure showed on her face. She took a deep breath before facing him. "Wesley, this has got to stop."

Deanna jumped when she felt his arms steal around her to pull her close. He was so gentle that she momentarily stood still and enjoyed the movement. It reminded her of a time long ago when Will had done the same to her. Arms that were still scrawny from immaturity, felt just like Wesley's. She smiled at the distant memory and she almost wilted in his arms when she felt feather-light kisses upon her neck.

Wesley grinned against her soft skin when he heard her soft moan. He had waited a long time to do this. The photo had become a sort of goal and he was determined to take the first opportunity to mirror it, but even he didn't expect his chance to come this soon. But even he knew that she was going to come to her senses any moment, and sure enough, he eventually felt her pull at his arms.

"No, Wesley, this is wrong." She cried, as she pulled herself free of his embrace, spinning on her heals to confront him. "I see I'm going to have to stay away from you completely to make you stop this insanity.'

Her heart wrenched at the boyish grin he threw at her as he challenged, "No, Deanna, I don't think you're going to be able to."

Wesley walked around her, still grinning seductively at her stunned face as he continued to watch her as he walked out of the cargo-bay, leaving her where she stood, unable to move.

Chapter 4

Deanna was going crazy! And worse still, she had absolutely nobody to talk to. Will wouldn't understand. Beverly would kill her, and the captain...well, she could just imagine his face. That thought alone was enough for her not to tell him.

But later, unable to settle in her own quarters, she found herself sitting in the Ten Forward lounge, sipping on a hot chocolate. But even that didn't weave it's usual magic.

"It can't be that bad."

Deanna looked up into the rich chocolate eyes of Guinan and the bar-tender and smiled sadly. Deanna had often thought that the two of them were very much alike as Guinan probably solved as many counselling cases as Deanna did, in her own unique way. It never annoyed her, in fact, sometimes it was a blessing in disguise. Sometimes she didn't need everyone else's emotional baggage, Oh, she loved her job, but even Counselor's got a little depressed now and then. Like now, and somehow Guinan always filled that gap that she purposely left.

"Oh, believe me, it is." she scoffed, derisively.

Guinan's eyebrows lifted, "Really! Anything I can help you with?"

Deanna laughed quietly, "Well, I'm actually too embarrassed to say. But I must say, it's nice to be able to say that to you."

Guinan pondered over the strange conversation for a moment before adding seriously, aware that Deanna's plight was more serious than she was letting on. "A, you should really tell some-one you completely trust. It wouldn't matter if it disgusted them, or angered them. In the end they would get past all that, and eventually, they would there to help you."

Deanna stared into her drink, realising once again that the uncanny woman was right. She looked up to tell her so, but as usual, Guinan had wandered off, leaving Deanna to pluck up the courage to go and see the only person she trusted her whole life with. The only person who would listen and do his best to help her; Will Riker.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

By the time Deanna had reached Will's quarters, she was shaking in her shoes, but she knew that she needed to unload this weight off her chest, otherwise she was going to explode.

It was some time before he answered her hail and was surprised to see her standing at his door. "Deanna! come in, I was just about to eat. Care to join me?" He asked casually.

She shook her head, her tummy rolling with the prospect of putting food inside her already queasy stomach. "No, thanks. I'm sorry, I can come back later..."She said, turning away from him.

She began to walk away but Will sensed that Deanna needed to talk, so he gently grabbed her arm and pulled her further into the room, motioning for her to sit. Within seconds he felt the anxiety begin to rise within him and he realized that something was seriously upsetting Deanna.

He touched her lightly on the arm, urging her to open up to him. "Dee, what's wrong? Come on, talk to me. You can tell me anything."

Will started when he saw the tears spring to her eyes at his last remark and he felt his heart race with fear. Reaching out for her, he pulled her into his arms. "Imzadi, please."

Her voice broke on a sob. "Oh, Will, I don't know what to do! I've got myself into an impossible situation."

"It can't be that bad, can it?" He asked carefully, his mouth against her soft hair, breathing in her very essence.

Deanna nodded rapidly against his chest and his mind raced through so many terrible reasons that he was almost to frightened to ask. "What? Tell me."

She pulled back from him and bravely looked into his face, her tears shimmering upon her lashes, daring to fall. "Someone has fallen in love with me."

Will laughed outright, relieved it was nothing so bad. "Is that it?"

She nodded again.

Will was bemused with her. "So what's wrong with that?"

"I think I have some feelings for him too."

He laughed again. "Yes, so what's wrong with that?"

"He's very young."

"Yes," he laughed again, humouring her. "so what's wrong with that?"

"He's only seventeen."

He was momentarily startle, but not for long. "Oh, well, I guess there's nothing really wrong with that, is there?" he asked, reassuring her. That was until she dropped her bombshell.

"It's...Wesley Crusher, Will."

Chapter 5

Will stared at her face, trying to see if it was some kind of sick joke she was playing and he decided that it must be and began to laugh nervously. But moments later he must have imagined something really funny because he suddenly burst out into a fit of giggles. But then when he turned to look at her shattered face again and saw the misery plainly there for all to see, the laughter quickly died.

Will couldn't take his eyes away from her, the questions cascaded through his mind, one after the other. "Dee, tell me you are kidding, please!"

Deanna broke the trance-like state she gone into when he'd started laughing at her. The pain she felt when she realised that he didn't understand was even worse than what she had imagined. Deanna looked down at her hands and shook her head sadly. She couldn't bring herself to say anything more but jumped at his voice when he spoke again.

"Wesley Crusher!" he snapped harshly. "Deanna, he's little more than a child. He's a spotty teenager with raging hormones. He's geeky, and I bet he's still a virgin too!" he ploughed on. "He's skinny and he's big-headed. He's conceited, obnoxious, he's goofy and he's..."

Every insult jabbed at her heart and Deanna knew everything he was saying was true. But then why was she feeling like this towards him? Her eyes, when she looked back to Will, mirrored her despair and he stopped his tirade when he realized that this really was happening to her - to them and Deanna's tears had confirmed the worst. She really had fallen for the young ensign.

He felt he had no choice but to ask her with dread in his heart, "So, what are you going to do about it?"

She shrugged at the same time she shook her head, her dilemma clear. Deanna knew that a relationship was out of the question, but she also knew that there was something between the two of them that need resolving one way or the other.

Will decided to try the forcing some honest facts upon her. "Can you really see yourself walking around the ship arm in arm with him?" He asked. "Could you sit in the same room as Beverly while you were draped over each other, necking?" his voice rose an octave. "Can you even imagine what the captain would say, Deanna!? have you thought about that!?"

And then the question of all questions. He lowered his voice and barely whispered to her, "Deanna, could you really see yourself making love to him?"

Deanna stood abruptly as his words screamed through her senses. She didn't answer him because she couldn't. She just didn't know what to say. Tactfully Will kept quiet while he let her absorb the problems that having an affair with Wesley Crusher would entail.

Eventually he heard her sigh, "You're right, it is a stupid idea." She turned and gave him a watery smile. "Thanks. I really needed someone to knock some sense into me."

Knowing that their strange conversation had ended and recognising Deanna's need to escape, Will stood and walked over to Deanna and placed his hands upon her shoulders, forcing her to look up at him. His gut churned at the misery in her face and he kissed her gently on the forehead before letting her leave.

Will knew that she needed to be alone. Hell, he needed to be alone. His mind went over and over the conversation and he just hoped he'd managed to make her see sense. The thought of her and Wesley Crusher together angered him beyond reason and there was no way while there was still a breath of life in his body, that he was going to allow the boy to ever to get the chance to get anywhere near her, even if it meant chasing after Deanna Troi himself.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Deanna walked slowly along to her quarters, her mind going over her conversation with Will. She stopped short when she saw Wesley propped up against her door, very clearly waiting for her. He looked slightly nervous but also very determined.

Wesley stood up straight when he saw her approaching. Deanna came to a stop in front of him and her arms automatically crossed in front of her body as she looked at him sternly and spoke. "Wesley, you shouldn't be here. This is wrong, please leave me alone."

He shook his head slowly and approached her. "No, Deanna, you don't really want me to go. I want to talk to you. Let me in." he asked quietly, giving her little chance to refuse.

He moved forward to stand close enough for her to feel his breath on her face. His eyes smouldered and she couldn't stop herself from leaning into him. Wesley seized the moment and captured her within his arms and bravely gave her a kiss that surprised himself more than it surprised her.

Afterwards, Wesley lovingly looked down onto her face. Her eyes were closed, her breath shallow and erratic. He barely heard her sweet whisper. "Take me inside, Wes."

Wesley grinned and called out the override code to her quarters. The door hissed open and he took her hand and led her inside. But as soon as he entered he stood in the middle of the room nervously and Deanna realized that Wesley didn't have a clue what to do next. She audibly sighed as she reached for him. "Kiss me again."

Gently, Wesley took her in his arms and kissed her the same way he had done in the corridor making Deanna groan. Not with passion, she realised, but with frustration as she became acutely aware that he didn't know what to do next.

Will would have begun caressing her body as his kisses become more ardent. Will would have swept her up into his strong arms and carried her into the bedroom and lay her upon the bed, stripping her clothes gently away as he did so.

Deanna groaned with unspent desire as her body began to react with the vibrant images beginning to race through her mind. She broke the kiss and looked up into Wesley's very innocent but desirable face. Deanna was more than aware that she shouldn't do what she was about to do, but even so, something deep inside told her that she was going to have to.

Boldly, Deanna took hold of his hand and placed it upon her aching breast. Wesley's startled look soon turned to one of wonder as he awkwardly moved his fingers around the unfamiliar territory, feeling the luscious contours marvelling at his good fortune in succeeding to have got this far. Eventually he got braver and placed his other hand upon her.

Fascinated, Wesley watched her face change as desire flushed her cheeks pink and he felt his own excitement begin to grow. Deanna's eyes slipped shut and her head dropped back and she completely abandoned her body and her mind to the moment. Her mouth fell open as desire began to take a hold. Wesley was entranced as he moved closer and began to nuzzle her neck. Needing to feel - touch him, Deanna tugged at his arms, pulling his body closer until it nestled against hers.

But she needed him closer. If it had been Will, he would have finished undressing her by this point and her mind screamed at Wesley to move onto the next stage of his seduction.

When she moved her hands to the back of her tunic,Wesley realised what she was going to do. Wesley stopped his ministrations and stood back from her to watch her strip, his eyes widening at the sight that was unfolding before him. He simply couldn't believe his innocent luck. Many times, himself and other young ensigns on the ship had gossiped about Deanna Troi, ultra babe. And boy! did he have something to tell them all now.

As Deanna stood before him in a sheer cream camisole set, Wesley was transfixed, and once again Deanna sighed loudly as she reached for his hand and led him into her bedroom.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Will prowled around his quarters, unable to get the surreal and strange conversation he'd had with Deanna out of his mind and it was driving him insane. Unable to stand another minute of torture, he made his mind up and he barked to thin air, "Computer, location of Wesley Crusher?"

His heart stopped at it's reply. 'Wesley Crusher is Counselor Deanna Troi's quarters.'

Will held his breath as he asked with dread, "Computer, location of Counselor Deanna Troi?"

'Counselor Troi is also in her quarters.'

Will tried to reach her telepathically, to see if she was in trouble, but he felt nothing from her. He sighed with relief and headed out of his quarters, hastily making his way to hers along the corridor. He tried to convince himself that there was nothing but a conversation going on behind her closed doors, but his gut was telling him differently.

When Will reached Deanna's door and hailed her, he got no response. Panic got the upper hand and Will used the override command and stepped cautiously into her domain as soon as the door opened. It was quiet inside, too quiet and Will walked towards her bedroom door and slowly pushed it open, dreading what he would find.

The light from the lounge filtered through the door enough for Wesley Crusher to realise that they were no longer alone and guiltily, he turned around with a startled look upon his face when he saw who it was. Will's face mirrored his until he slowly moved his disbelieving eyes down Wesley's body. His gaze stopped at his pants; One leg off and the other was on it's way to meet it's mate that sat in a puddle by his foot.

Will's wide eyes shot back up to the younger man's face, not quite believing what he was seeing. It was then that Will heard the gasp from behind Wesley's torso and he craned his head to look around him. Deanna was laying prone on the bed in pretty underwear that was also clearly in the process of being removed, and willingly by the way that her body was positioned across the bed.

it was a long, stunned and tense silence before the shock wore off enough and they all cried in unison,

"Commander!"

"Will!"

"Deanna!"

Chapter 6

"GET OUT!"

As Will's shocked and horrified voice boomed throughout the room, both Wesley and Deanna jumped with the ferocity that came with it. Will turned and pointed towards the door, his full stare on Wesley as he roared again, "I said, GET OUT! NOW!"

Wesley stumbled over his trousers, tugging them up his skinny legs as he hurriedly crept past Will, cowering low in case he hit him. Will watched him go with sheer malice in his blazing blue eyes until he had completely left her quarters, and he didn't give a hoot that he was now probably running along the corridor in nothing more than his underpants. Will was so angry, mostly at himself for not seeing it coming. Angry at himself for turning Deanna away, and angry for leaving her on Risa so long ago. Will was just bloody furious with everything!

Slowly, Will eventually turned to face Deanna. She was sitting up in bed looking at him with fear in her eyes and he watched as she unconsciously pulled at the sheet to cover her nudity. Her eyes never left his face as they stared at each other and tried to rein in the emotions that were still screaming out of control inside of them both. Time stood still for the couple who still had so much between them, but not enough to totally fulfil each others wants and desires, and neither one of them dared to take that last leap of faith to re-unite, either for their love for each other or for their long lost souls that still silently searched for completion.

Will took one step towards her but hesitated when he saw her eyes grow wider as she inwardly started to panic. He stopped himself and closed his eyes in order to bring himself in check before he dared to try and speak to her. He knew that what ever he said to her now could escalate into words that they would both regret, but eventually, with pain in his heart and his voice cracking with emotion, he had to whisper, "Why, Deanna?"

Deanna's eyes filled with tears and with bewilderment, she numbly shook her head. She was so confused and Will could sense that. He forced his rigid stance to melt a little along and took a few tentative steps towards her and asked again, desperately needing to make some sense of it all. "Why, Deanna? After everything I said to you. Why did you allow him to touch you?"

Shock began to make her shake and tentively, Deanna held her hand out to Will as her eyes begged him to sit beside her so that she could try and make him understand, and then hopefully, forgive her.

He looked at the hand outstretched to him, and after a long moment, Will took it within his and he quietly sat down close beside her, taking both of her chilled hands within his.

Deanna hesitated before she spoke and Will saw a tear escape her eye and trail a lonely path down her cheek. He reached his hand across and gently stroked it away. He was surprised as a hand suddenly caught his and pressed her face into its palm. Will felt the featherlight kiss against it and his heart quickened it's beat, inwardly groaning with futile need at what the innocent movement meant.

Unable to quell the quickening his body felt Will pulled his hand away, effectively severing the intimacy until such time he felt he could reciprocate. Right then, Will simply was not ready for her. He needed to hear some kind of explanation for her odd behaviour. "Deanna, why Wesley Crusher? I need to know." He asked, unable to hide the confusion lacing his words and his heart.

Her beautiful face frowned lightly as she pondered on the reason why she was so drawn to the youngster until she shrugged and gave him the cryptic answer. "I'm not sure, Will. I know that when he's near me, I think about you."

He looked at her with surprise, purely because it wasn't what he was expecting her to say. "Me!? Why, for heaven's sake!?"

Deanna looked away as she remembered a time long past, a time that she recalled and treasured often. "I see him, Will and I remember you, when we were on Betazed." She turned back to face him, her eyes troubled as she continued, "I think it's because he reminds me of how you were, then."

Will was clearly perplexed, but no matter how he tried to see it, he couldn't see the connection, "But he's nothing like me, Deanna, not to look at, or how I am."

Turning away for a moment, Deanna picked up the photograph of the two of them and studied it with a sad smile on her face. "When Wesley held me like you did when this picture was taken, it was you. I can't explain why." Her delicate shrug was laden with misery.

Troubled, Will pulled her to her feet and the sheet that covered her near-nudity fell to the floor, but neither noticed. This wasn't the time for anything sexual and as Will gently pushed on her shoulders so that she faced away from him, he placed his arms around her and pulled her close to his body, just like the photograph. He asked as his breath caressed her ear, "Like this?"

Even though Deanna slowly shook her head, they continued to savour the moment as she lay back within his strong arms ass they both remembered the long past moment. They were lost in the happy memory until Deanna spoke. "No, it's not the same. You're not the same, Will."

Will was beginning to get frustrated and annoyed with her. "What do you mean, I'm not the same?" he said, exasperated. "I'm still me, Deanna. I can still hold you the same, and I still love you the same."

Deanna pivoted in his embrace to look up into his face, the tender endearment completely escaping her. "No! you're...bigger. The Will on Betazed was still a young man, not much older than Wesley is now. You didn't have a beard then, either, just like Wesley. It's like he's you...then." she explained, realizing then at that moment, that she was at last, making sense.

And just as suddenly, Will understood and he gently lifted her face so that she had no choice but to look into his eyes. His understanding, his love, his compassion, his sorrow, and his heartfelt apology at the grief he had caused her when he had left her behind on Risa, rushed through her as he crushed her against his chest, enfolding her in his arms as he poured out his heart.

"I am so sorry, Imzadi, I should never have left you. I know now that I could have had both you and my Starfleet career, and I should have come back for you. I wanted to, so many times and I should have known that you would have waited for me. I used to dream about you every night, and I often dreamt that you were calling me. I should have come back for you, Deanna. I'm so sorry."

His apology came with a choked sob and Deanna pulled him tighter into her own embrace.

Will held her tightly, burying his face into her soft neck as they collected themselves. Eventually, though, the began to notice the fragile situation that they were in, but now it felt right.

Will slowly began to move his hands up her slender body and his fingertips brushed lightly over the satin camisole she wore. His body's response was instant. Deanna began to move her own hands over his back. Looking into each others eyes at the same time, they both succumbed to the passion that had to happen between them.

Their lips met and exploded. Will groaned into her mouth as he pulled her even tighter into his embrace and he pushed his hardness against her own rising desire, forced there by his hands as they gently cupped her behind, somehow managing to bring her even closer to him.

Tearing herself mouth away from his , Deanna whimpered raggedly against his throat, her plea more than evident in her one word. "Will!?"

Will bent his knees a little and with his strong hands, dragged Deanna up by her buttocks. Her legs automatically locked around his waist and kissing her deeply, he lowered her onto the bed and positioned himself between her knees. There was no time to remove clothes and no time to stop and make love leisurely. Neither wanted it any other way.

Will reached down between them and unzipped his fly, moving aside the satiny material the had kept her hidden from him. He entered her in one, swift motion and her scream was caught in his kiss as he held her head captive within his strong hands. Feeling him as he embedded himself deep inside her body, Deanna's eyes flew open with surprise.

Will grinned into her shocked face and crowed triumphantly, "Something else that has gotten bigger with the rest of me."

Chapter 7

"Ensign Crusher to Commander Riker."

Will watched Deanna's face while they waited for the young ensigns response to come back across the airwaves and eventually they got the response they were waiting for. "Yes, sir."

"Can you please join the Counselor and I in her quarters, A.S.A.P?"

They heard Wesley's voice turn squeaky as he now nervously answered. "Y..Yes, sir. I..I'm on my way."

Will and Deanna sat on her sofa and readied herself for the confrontation that they all knew that they had to have. Will's hand reached across and briefly gripped hers in a reassuring gesture and she smiled nervously at him, jumping a little when the door acknowledged his arrival.

Will barked to his hail, "Come!"

The door hissed open, and Wesley, suddenly looking like the scared little boy that he technically was, hesitated on the threshold. Unsure of what was going to happen to him, his large eyes were unable to hide his fear at what the man who up until then had become like a second father to him, was going to do to him. The same man who, besides the captain, held his respected awe in every aspect of his young life. All his goals that he aimed for were incited by his reverence of his commanding officer, which made the next few minutes coming, ten times harder.

But he wasn't ready to give up on Deanna and had to pluck up the nerve to tell him so, when the time was right.

"Come in Wesley," He growled unnecessarily. "I'm not going to bite you, yet" he added, just for the sheer hell of it.

Wesley hesitantly stepped further into the room and Will watched the handsome young man's eyes settle upon Deanna, his innocent longings for her very obviously evident in his tawny brown eyes.

Will turned to speak to Deanna and was startled to see her looking at the boy in very much the same way. No words were said, but the air was charged with a smouldering passion and Will quickly realized that his task of ending the ridiculous situation was going to be harder than what he initially thought, because he now knew that it wasn't just Wesley Crusher he was dealing with, but his own Imzadi, too.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Before Wesley had arrived to her quarters, they had originally planned to talk openly about the attraction and to try and make Wesley understand Deanna's dilemma. And then they were going to let him down gently. But now seeing them together, Will decided that it need a much larger shock tactic.

Reaching across, Will took Deanna's hand and proclaimed, "Wesley, Deanna and I have decided to become a couple again."

He watched Wesley's eyes leave Deanna's face to turn and look at him, his confusion apparent. Will tried again, a little more forcefully this time. "We are lovers, Wes."

Deanna gasped at the bluntness of his remark and his apparent disregard for ship's protocol. "Will!" She cried. "Don't do this!"

Wesley mind finally focused on what was being said and his reply was puzzled and ignorant. "But...Deanna wants to be with me!"

Keeping his predatory smile hidden, Will gently shook his head, realizing that for the boy's sake, this wasn't the time for ridicule. "No, Wesley, Deanna's attraction to you was because she was having difficulty getting through a traumatic event in her past with me. You reminded her of it, and subsequently it also reminded her of me and she realized it was happening because subconsciously, she was still in love with me."

Deanna finally found her voice, understanding where Will was going with his brutal lesson. "I'm sorry, Wesley, but Will is right, it can never work between us. I love Will, and he loves me."

Wesley jumped to his feet, staring alternatively at both of them, his eyes crazy with denial. "No! No, you love me, Deanna, and one day you'll love me instead of him. I'm not giving up. I'm going to fight for you, Deanna!" He spluttered bravely, and before either of them could react at his ridiculous challenge, Wesley rushed out of her quarters.

Will watched him go with trepidation, and Deanna watched him go with anticipation. What would the young ensign do next? They both wondered.

Chapter 8

No matter how many times Will tried to search out Wesley Crusher, he always managed to either elude him, or conveniently be with another crew member. Even hiding behind his mother had become a frequent occurrence.

Of course, Beverly was delighted at her son's attentions, and she related her joy, and confusion to Deanna one evening a couple of days later in the Ten Forward lounge. "I don't know what's got into him, Deanna, he doesn't seem to want to leave my side. I wonder," she mused aloud, "if this girl he's obviously attracted to is giving him the runaround. I'd love to know who she is. There's only eight teenage girls on board, isn't there? So it must be easy to find out who she is."

Beverly suddenly brightened, an idea forming in her head. "How do you fancy doing a bit of detective work with me, Counselor?" she asked, grinning with mischief.

Beverly looked up at Deanna with surprise when the counselor suddenly jumped to her feet and proclaimed, "Crikey, is that the time? Duty calls, I'm afraid, Bev. My next appointment was due five minutes ago! Gotta run, bye, Beverly."

Beverly watched her closest friend practically run from the lounge, her own, 'bye' dying on her lips as she wondered if it had been something she'd said.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Wesley was in Engineering when he heard the hail for all senior officers to report to the Ready room. He was aware that they had just reached an unchartered moon, which meant that after a short briefing, an away team would be heading down to the planet surface for a look around. His private grin brought a curious look from Geordie La Forge. "Everything okay, Ensign?"

Wesley face beamed full force, "Yes, sir, things couldn't be better."

Geordie frowned as the younger man hurriedly made his way out of engineering and muttered to himself, "Now what's that boy up to?"

But knowing how intelligent he was, Geordi had no qualms about leaving him under the guidance of his other staff. Geordie chuckled to himself, recalling many a time when Wesley had indeed taught him a few things about his job.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

From a viewport, Wesley watched the runabout leave the docking bay and his heart-beat quickened with anticipation. "Computer, location of Counselor Troi?"

"The Counselor is in her office." It replied.

He quickly made his way to her office's level, constantly looking around him, expecting Will Riker to leap out of the shadows and put a huge hand on his shoulder. He heaved a huge sigh of relief when he finally reached his destination. Wesley listened with his ear against the metallic door and heard no voices on the other side, deciding that surprise was the best course of action.

Wesley quickly entered and Deanna looked up in surprise, her mouth opening wide when she saw who it was. He walked straight over to her, his steps quick and sure, and before she had a chance to move, and before he had a chance to lose his bottle, Wesley bent and planted a quick kiss on her upturned lips.

Nothing had been said and nothing wanted to be said. Before Deanna even had a chance to react, Wesley took the chance and her stunned silence and kissed her again, this time deepening the kiss. She felt his tongue try to invade her mouth and Deanna resisted until his hand came up and gently held the back of her head. His other hand reached down to capture hers and he pulled it up to his chest. Wesley felt her submission as she flowered beneath him and his tongue finally made it's way into the hot depths of her now willing mouth.

Neither heard the soft footsteps approaching her door, but they both heard the horrified gasp that told them that their intimacy had been witnessed, and as they guiltily sprung apart, they both turned to face the unwelcome intruder. The intruder was Beverly Crusher.

Chapter 9

"GET OUT!"

As Beverly screeched the command out, her anger and shock at what she had witnessed made her visibly shake. As her finger pointed to the door, Wesley went to walk towards it, his head hanging in shame. His feet stopped as somehow, her voice managed to raise yet another octave. "NOT YOU! HER!" She turned to face Deanna. "GET OUT!" she screamed.

Deanna visibly paled as she stood and spoke. "Beverly, please, let me expl..."

"NOT NOW, COUNSELOR!" She roared, her next words shaking Deanna to the core, "I'll deal with you, later. Now I want to talk to my son. Alone."

Uneasily, Deanna walked towards to the door, pausing briefly to try once more to explain. But when she looked into her dearest friends eyes, feeling and seeing the anguish and the pain, she knew that now was not the time. The distraught counselor quietly left the room, finally allowing the tears to run unchecked down her cheeks, blinding her vision as she hurried out.

As soon as she was out of earshot of her office, Deanna slumped against the corridor wall and slid down onto the floor as her sobs became uncontrollable, hiding her face and her shame in her shaking hands.

How long she sat there for, Deanna didn't know, but it wasn't long before she felt herself being pulled into the familiar strong arms of the only person who knew that, despite what had clearly happened, he still adored her, and he still whispered comforting words to her, and he still loved her with every fibre of his heart, his body and his soul.

As they heard the hiss of the door opening, they both looked up. Will gripped her firmly and Deanna didn't know whether it was to stop her running away, or for the moral support for whatever they were about to receive from their mutual friend.

As mother and son came face to face with their two friends that were still locked in a comforting embrace, Wesley nearly walked into his mother. A stony silence followed as each pair of eyes looked at each others. Hurt, betrayal, anger and despair showed in each of them and eventually it was Beverly who broke the frozen moment. Holding her head high with tears in her blotchy red eyes, she walked past them without a second glance.

Wesley followed his mother past and his eyes never left Deanna's face. He hesitated briefly, as if to say something, but then thought better of it and hurriedly caught up with his mom. Will and Deanna silently watched them walk down the corridor until they were out of sight.

Will hugged her tighter against him and gently manoeuvred her back towards her office. Deanna broke away from him as soon as the door closed and Will leant against it, watching her pace restlessly around the small room, until eventually, she sat stiffly on the edge of the plush couch. Her quiet voice finally broke the tense silence. "I'm sorry."

Will tried hard to keep the dismay out of his own voice when he asked, "What happened, Deanna?"

Deanna vaguely raised her hands in a shrug. She wasn't sure how it had happened and didn't know how to explain it to him, either, "I don't know," she whispered. "He just came to see me and we...started kissing. Beverly caught us." she added, unnecessarily.

Will pushed himself off the door, walked over and sat beside her and faced her, But she couldn't bring herself to look into those brilliant blue eyes that only wanted to understand, and that made her feel even more like a wretch.

Here she was, trying her hardest to screw around with a teenager, when, in truth, she had the dishiest man to grace the universe at her back and call. A man who loved her, and who worshipped her very being. He was the same man who had made her what she was today, and right at that moment, she wanted to die.

Will's hand rose to lift her chin and forced her to look at him. A single teardrop escaped from the pool that had gathered again in her eye and he watched it trickle down her cheek, eventually stopping at her lip.

Will leaned forward and gently kissed the moisture away and said quietly, "I love you, Imzadi. I want to help. Help me understand."

Her choked sob brought on a fresh wave of tears and Will began to kiss her as she sobbed. He kissed away her tears, until eventually,she finally stopped, and after a quick hug, he pulled her back to her feet, his words bringing a new dread. "Come on, it's time to talk to Beverly."

Chapter 10

Beverly was hiding in her office in sick-bay when Will and Deanna finally found her, in her office, seated in her chair, waiting for them. She knew that would come, they had to, they were too close as friends to leave things as they were.

And although she was angry, Beverly also knew that this was not the normal behaviour of Deanna Troi and she had begun to wonder if there was a medical reason for her actions. What she didn't know was that Will had come to the same conclusion.

Deanna hesitated at her door and Will gently tugged at her arm, pulling her inside. Beverly smiled sadly at her, "Come in, Deanna. I'm sure there is a perfectly logical explanation for all of..." She struggled to find the right word but finally settled with, "this."

Deanna looked to Will for assurance and his smile give her the necessary nudge that she needed. Will clutched her hand as they sat down and waited expectantly. Beverly smiled at the gesture, not quite meeting Deanna's eyes. "If you were ten years younger, Deanna, I would have been happy for you and Wesley to have been an item. However, the fact that you two seem to be unusually drawn to each other makes me come to the conclusion that something is not quite right. So, I want to run a few tests just to make sure, okay?"

Deanna nodded slowly and dared to ask, "Where is Wesley now?"

Beverly took on a stern motherly look and told her, "At this very moment, he is in Captain Picard's quarters getting a very stiff fatherly lecture about who you can and cannot fall in love with."

Will grinned with surprise. "The Captain! I'd like to be a fly on the wall for that conversation. He's not exactly endeared to children, is he?"

Beverly muttered stiffly, her face tinging pink, "Yes, well, he was my only choice as he couldn't very well talk to you, could he?"

Will looked down at his hand, "No, I know, I'm sorry about that."

An awkward, silent moment followed until Beverly abruptly stood up. "Well, Will, if you'd care to leave us for a while whilst I run these few tests on Deanna, I'll give you a call when we're done."

She hurriedly ushered Will out of the door and Deanna followed her into the sick-bay area and gingerly slid up on to the bio-bed. Beverly instructed her to lay down and pulled her ever-present tricorder out and began to run it above Deanna's nervous body.

After tapping at it a few times, Beverly put it to one side and turned to the consul beside her. Deanna watched the various coloured waves cross the screen and her eyes flitted to Beverly every once in a while to see if anything registered, but Beverly was seemingly concentrating hard on the screen before her.

But Deanna knew her friend better than that and eventually, still absorbed with the screen before her, Beverly spoke quietly to her. "So...did you get very far with my son?"

Deanna's eyes studied her as she considered her question before asking gently, "Are you asking me if I made love to him, Beverly?"

Unable to look at her, Deanna watched Beverly nervously swallow and her head nodded rapidly. Looking tenderly up at her, Deanna touched her arm, imploring her to face her. Beverly quickly glanced at her and saw the genuine look of friendship in her eyes, and finally, boldly answered her, head on. "Beverly, I did not sleep with Wesley."

The breath that Beverly held came out shakily and Deanna basked in her relief. Smiling encouragingly at her, Deanna's fingers squeezed her arm and now embarrassed, Beverly turned back to the screen, her attention now fully focused to the matter at hand.

Noticing the slight, very slight, change in the wave pattern to a previous routine check, Beverly spoke aloud, "I think I have found something. The Neural Imaging scanner is picking up a slight variation. Tell me," she asked excitedly, "what had happened when you first found an attraction to Wesley?"

Deanna thought back for a moment, then slowly replied. "He left a brooch in my quarters and I assumed it was from Will. And then he left me a poem, which reminded me of something Will had given to me when he was on Betazed. But it really started when he held me..."

Feeling Beverly's tension escalate again, she quickly looked at her to see how she was handling the intimate discussion about her son, but Beverly merely whispered, "Go on."

"I have a photo of Will and I in my bedroom that is very, very special to me. One day, Wesley held me that very same way and it took me back to that moment. All I kept seeing was Wesley as Will."

Beverly frowned, "But why? He looks nothing like Will!"

Deanna smiled to herself as the familiar thought run through her mind, I've had this conversation before' "It was Wesley's build mostly," she continued. "the way he kissed me, and held me. Will said Wesley was bringing out a deep traumatic feeling of loss that I'd experienced when he left me behind on Risa. He...Wesley, brought it all back to me."

Beverly stared at her friend for a long moment, then shook herself to clear the images that raced through her mind. "Well, the good news is that I can help suppress these thoughts with a neural neutralizer. It will hopefully cure the problem. But," she added, "I suggest you have a long chat with Will and get things totally out in the open. It sounds like you've both got a lot of forgiving to do."

As Beverly wandered over to her work station to prepare the hypospray needed to suppress Deanna's thoughts, Deanna agreed, nodding. Although they had already started to talk about the past, there was still along way to go, and then Deanna suddenly remembered the rest of Beverly's analysis. "And the bad news?" she asked.

Beverly returned to her side and pushed the hypospray into her neck. "The bad news is," she grinned, "is, how are we going to cure young Wesley of his infatuation with you?"

Chapter 11

Three weeks later...

The Captain looked around at his senior officers who were waiting for his explanation as to why they were taking on board their latest guests, who were due to be beamed aboard from the planet Clavdia at any moment. "We have been asked to escort the new leader and her companion to her home world, Daled 1V. The planet is in the middle of an uprising and are in desperate need of the new ruler to arrive and take leadership. " He turned to his security officer. "Worf, you will accompany me to the transporter room please." He stood, ending the meeting. "Thank you, that'll be all."

They all rose together and headed back to their various duties. Returning back down in engineering, Geordie remembered that he'd forgotten to pick a new SCM from the stores on route. He spotted Wesley and called him over, "Hey, Wes, do me a favour and run to stores for me and pick up a new SCM, will you, please?"

Wesley grinned, finally, a chance to fit a new superconducting magnet, "Yes, sir, right away!"

Minutes later, as he stepped out off the turbo-lift, he nearly walked head-on into the group who were walking along the corridor. Wesley's eyes focused on another pair of eyes and he couldn't help himself as he stared into the face of the prettiest girl he seen since, well, since Deanna.

He had gotten over his infatuation with her after constantly being chaperoned everywhere so that they were never alone. Although Deanna had somehow managed to block his attentions out now, all had been forgiven, because, after all, it was understood that everybody had to have a first love.

The Captain broke into his wayward thoughts and he turned he attention to him. "Ah, Salia, Anya, this is, Ensign Wesley Crusher, a very promising young officer who will go far with his chosen career in Starfleet."

As Salia and Wesley looked longingly into each others eyes, Captain Picard raised his own to the heavens and thought, 'Oh, God, here we go again...'