Imzadi

GIVING IN
by Carol Sandford
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She stood before him, and it was a moment that Will would never forget. It was a moment that, with just one movement, one word, or one look, would shatter the resolve that had kept him riveted to the spot and that kept him from reaching out for her.

He was torn in two; he wanted what was about to happen to happen, but more than that, he didn't want to lose her, and somehow, something deep inside, told him that this moment was going to be a mistake, a dreadful mistake and he didn't know how to stop it happening.

Will didn't know how to make her stop because more than anything in the cosmos, and in his heart, he wanted her to approach him and give him - show him, what was so clearly written in her beautiful Cimmerian eyes.

She stepped forward and he stepped back, his eyes never leaving hers. He was too afraid, afraid that if he let his guard slip, she would take advantage of the lapse and he would be lost, totally lost if she reached out and touched him.

Will saw the immediate shimmer in her eyes, sorry that he was hurting her and he didn't want to. God help him, it was the last thing he wanted to do, but it was inevitable. Whatever happened today...now, would hurt her.

And himself.

But she was determined. The glint in her eyes amongst the translucent teardrops that clung heavily to her eyelashes could not be ignored or denied. But Will was going to try, determined that he was going to fight her every step of the way, but even he had to acknowledge that he was rapidly losing the battle.

The woman before him wanted him; his touch, his lips, his body and his heart. Will silently acceded his heart to her, it was always hers, always. But to give her the rest meant more, but more meant certain pain and he'd hurt her enough in the past and he didn't want to hurt in the future.

She stepped forward again and Will knew he had nowhere to go other than against the hard edge of his doorway, but he still took that fateful step even though it caused his heart to drop to his toes at what he knew was going to happen.

He saw the triumph in her eyes and he also saw the shuddering breath she took when she realized that she'd won - almost. He had to try to make her see. He had to make one last plea but his voice broke in two as spoke that plea.

"Please, Deanna, don't let me do this."

He expected her to put her petite body up against his. He expected her to settle her lips onto his lips, knowing that once she'd done that, he'd be lost, they'd both be lost, totally.

But she didn't, she did something worse, she spoke his divine name; the name that reminded him of a past full of passion, a present full of friendship and understanding, and a future full of pain. "Imzadi."

As her finger reached up to trace his jawline, his eyes fell shut with the wave of desire that surged throughout his whole body; His mind, his heart, his traitorous loins, and his soul. He heard her gasp and knew she had felt it all too.

Her hand was trembling as it settled over his heart and feeling its pulse, she spoke his name again, now with a question.

"Imzadi?"

His own hand, shaking as much as hers reached up to try and remove her tiny one, but as soon as it touched her softness, he brought it back up to his lips and kissed her palm, his agony etching itself across his features as the battle raged on within him.

His heart screamed, 'Please!' but his mind echoed, 'Please don't!' but it was hopeless. He couldn't stop pulling her into his embrace anymore than he could stop the sun from giving light.

His breath hurt as he struggled to stop the inevitable, but as his mouth covered hers, his guttural moan was entwined with her answering whimper. His body unwillingly hardened against her and he couldn't help himself from lowering his arms and pulling her to him; showing her what she was doing to him.

But Deanna didn't need to feel the evidence. It was written in his eyes, his lips, everywhere. Everywhere Will touched Deanna, inside and out, Deanna knew.

She also knew how much Will didn't want this.

But she did.

Will had pushed her away for long enough and she'd hung on for dear life waiting for a time when he could no longer deny her, or their relationship. For ten long years, Will had treated her like a very precious parcel that had been put away for safe keeping, afraid to open it for fearing he wouldn't like the gift inside.

But the gift was far too precious to be hidden any longer. Deanna knew he wasn't ready for her, not really ready. But she was ready for him and she wanted him, now.

Her mouth sought out his again and this time she told him in no uncertain terms that her body wanted what her tongue was receiving. He couldn't ignore the rhythmic movement; In and out, in and out, again and again, over and over.

Her body moved against his as she ground her most sensitive area upon the solid rock of his thigh, until at last, he gave in and pulled her small body up and continued the torturous dance upon his own bulging ache.

Her salve saturated mouth broke away as the intense heat within climbed higher and higher and as her head fell back, Will's half closed sex-fuelled eyes took in the vista before him.

Deanna was beautiful. The long column of her throat was flushed with heat, and her mouth, open as the tiny pants raged through her body was triumphant. Her eyes were closed, but not for long because Will wanted her to see what she was doing to him. He wanted her to see him fall apart in her arms.

Somehow she knew; she sensed his need. Raising her head once more, her eyes locked with his. The pressure built, the inner heat spiralling higher and higher, until at last, with a united cry, the explosion happened, shattering Will's resolve into a trillion pieces along with his petty excuses of keeping the woman he loved away.

As her orgasm along with his own happened, so did his belief that somehow, someway, they could be happy together, as a couple and as lovers, and as man and wife.

His fears dropped away as the image of her wearing his eternal ring cascaded through his mind, and holding her tightly in his arms as they slowly came back down from heaven, Will gently stroked her hair and rained tiny kisses across her forehead, and amongst the kisses, he couldn't stop himself from whispering over and over and over, "I Love you, Imzadi, I love you."

Deanna answered him by stepping away and Will felt the loss immediately, but only for a second. For a moment his bewildered eyes searched hers, and then fell lower as he studied her gentle smile. And then they fell lower still and he took the hand she was tenderly offering him.

End